116 year-old Ma-Huang accepted WD-40’s “What’s Left of Your Life-Time Supply Award” to promote the latest new application for WD-40: feminine dryness.
Author: Ofelia Uppen-Downe
Dyslexic Man Found Not Guilty of Date Rape, Citing “No Means On”
After deliberating for 12 minutes, the jury in Seattle, WA returned a no guilty verdict. “We are happy to see society take a step forward […]
Hackers Deface Christian Billboards in Bible Country
Police are investigating the hacking of Christian billboards along I-5 that caused several cars to go off the road. Police have asked anyone with tips […]
New Police Sunglasses Causing Problems in White Neighborhoods
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Seattle Ex-Heroin Addict Says Kicking Favorite Donuts “Twice as Tough”
It started with Lemon Poppy Seed Donuts When he was desperate for a heroin fix, “Jacob” (not real name) would go to Seattle’s Mighty O […]
‘Make a Wish Foundation’ Blames Seattle Nurse For Causing ‘Yet Another’ Boy’s Wish to ‘Not Die a Virgin’
“It’s so cute how he sexually harasses me,” Nurse Carmella Marquez, a Capitol Hill resident, told our photographer as our news crew showed up to […]
Capitol Hill “Street Throne” Appears Again at Summit & Olive Triggering Customary Performance Art
Street Throne Appears Again The infamous and mysterious “Capitol Hill Street Throne” appeared again this week at the top of another Capitol Hill incline, triggering […]
Anchor Not Pretty Enough for Roger Ailes to Harass is Leaving Fox
“I don’t want to be sexually harassed, but I want men to want to sexually harass me,”