Local resident Derek Harmon was officially recognized as “Almost a Hero” after making almost enough of an effort to catch a purse snatcher.
Category: Local
Judge Upholds Female Firefighters’ Right to “Not Go Out in Public Looking Like This”
“I can’t go out in public looking like this” is a valid reason for a female firefighter to need additional time arriving onsite at a fire, court rules.
Lottery Winner Inspires Others, “If I Can Beat the Odds, Anyone Can!”
She was just a farmer’s daughter with an 8th grade education. “Everyone told me I was going nowhere…look how wrong they were,” she said.
Hackers Deface Christian Billboards in Bible Country
Police are investigating the hacking of Christian billboards along I-5 that caused several cars to go off the road. Police have asked anyone with tips to come forward.
Seattle Ex-Heroin Addict Says Kicking Favorite Donuts “Twice as Tough”
It started with Lemon Poppy Seed Donuts When he was desperate for a heroin fix, “Jacob” (not real name) would go to Seattle’s Mighty O Donuts to lesson withdrawal by consuming six or more lemon poppy donuts for the tiny amount of morphine sometimes present in poppy seed residue. “I felt a little better after […]
‘Make a Wish Foundation’ Blames Seattle Nurse For Causing ‘Yet Another’ Boy’s Wish to ‘Not Die a Virgin’
“It’s so cute how he sexually harasses me,” Nurse Carmella Marquez, a Capitol Hill resident, told our photographer as our news crew showed up to interview everyone involved in this very odd Wish Foundation case. “Try to get a picture of him with that lustful little grin on his face.” And so we did… Lester’s […]
Capitol Hill “Street Throne” Appears Again at Summit & Olive Triggering Customary Performance Art
Street Throne Appears Again The infamous and mysterious “Capitol Hill Street Throne” appeared again this week at the top of another Capitol Hill incline, triggering locals to participate in a customary ritual that has developed over the years since the strange arrangement made its first surprise appearance in 2006. “The Throne” as locals call it, […]