NASA took its first giant step forward for “womankind” by announcing it had finally found a female employee qualified for male compensation.
“We’ve all known for years that, theoretically at least, a woman could become a ‘rocket scientist’, even if only a mediocre one.” NASA wrote on its website. “This mission was one of our longer explorations, but we’ve done it, we found a female employee worthy of a junior level male salary.”
Critics point out that the female employee is both lesbian and “functions as the man in her relationship”, and consequently the fanfare around her equal pay is misleading.
“We all know that the same elevated testosterone levels that cause her attraction to women and drive her manly behavior are why she’s able to perform on a junior male level,” psychologist David Kingston of University of Texas told the Diaper. “We need to be careful about our language so we don’t encourage little girls to aspire to try things that only manly women can achieve.”
Lessons Learned: Sally Ride, the Lesbian Astronaut
Kingston pointed to the lesson learned from the famous female astronaut Sally Ride.
“When Sally died in 2012, her sexuality was still a decades old secret,” Parker said. “She knew that in NASA’s male-dominant hierarchy, men would react more positively to ‘Ride the Female Astronaut’ than to ‘Ride the Lesbian Astronaut’. And she was right, her male colleagues lined up for ‘Ride the Female Astronaut” Parker said.
This mission was one of our longer explorations, but we’ve done it, we found a female employee worthy of a junior level male salary.